Hi there...
Been so depressed here.. of everything... job.. life.... struggles... and this Saturday had exam.. but haven't study yet.. -.- taken the exam before.. but not succeeded.. n this time the post also different.. well... SPA exam... not as if I'm gonna pass or have the job anyway... anyway.. it's all about politic... always -.- I guess I will study later or tomorrow.. haishhhh
My dear blog... I miss him so much.... I know I shouldn't.. as there's nothing more between us.. and most of all.. he had used and hurts me countless times... but I still miss him... hate myself... huhu... I miss him I miss I miss him.... I try to avoid try not to think about him try not to miss him... but I miss him... Dear God... please help me.... I don't know what else to do... only to You I can surrender...
Wednesday 12 September 2012
Wednesday 15 August 2012
Kuching Trip and Interview
Hi there! Miss u..my blog...
Quite busy lately..preparing and going to Kuching for interview... it was a good interview...2 hours..the longest record I have.. haha.... even being introduced to their departments and business activities.. -.-
Despite that..I stay at my sis Unni hostel...which happen to be my ex Unni and hostel...nostalgia..
Quite busy lately..preparing and going to Kuching for interview... it was a good interview...2 hours..the longest record I have.. haha.... even being introduced to their departments and business activities.. -.-
Despite that..I stay at my sis Unni hostel...which happen to be my ex Unni and hostel...nostalgia..
Friday 13 July 2012
Maybank: Interview
Hi there!
:)
Well,today I had interview with Maybank...
It was fun, really. Not stressful as mention by people. Just a simple n ordinary interview like those I've attended before. They do have essay test and personality test. But trust me, it was easy. So based on my HR experience, they might pick someone who is confident, talkative n maybe those with sales and marketing experience will be their priority.. :) Well can't blame them if they do. Coz it does minimize cost, in fact, especially in training people to become a good sales/marketing person.
At first they ask how Im doing, good or not, of coz I said Im good, coz I do feel good, I might a bit nervous before enter Maybank Office but once I enter, same as previous interview...the nervous fly away, I became myself again haha. Then they ask regarding my experience, my study background before, my CBG experience.. But most of all 3 of them were so excited asking/talking bout my experience of 6 months in Bintulu. :)
I enjoy the interview, we manage to talk and share a lot. :) And I also being honest with them, how I'm not really into a sales oriented person as I only come to know sales is one of the big scope of the position. Well, as they will found out later based on the personality test, I better just tell them 1st haha, at least Im being honest here. But Im glad...as I observe the 3 of them..their face looks n colour, while I admit and mention Im not really a sales oriented person, I can see their sincere and friendly smile, as if they were saying, "Owh ok, this girl indeed a straightforward and honest!" Haha.. and they also become more open with me,talk and ask me...and share more... :)
From this interview, Im glad they didnt ask things like, "Tell me about urself", "What is ur strength/weakness", those interview questions,for me..is..... unprofessional... -.- sorry I said that,but that's how i feel...coz it is expected and it's a "Google" questions haha... I think most of u would know what I mean..too common.. :)
It makes me happy that, eve after they interview, while waiting for dad to pick me up, they spotted me before they went for lunch and take the times to speak/talking to me again, feel as if they enjoy sharing/talking to me...Good...coz that mean I do have a good rapport with people haha...
I don't know I'll get the job or not... depends on their observation n management approval too... as the Malay said..kalau dah rezeki tak ke mana.. :)
Wow I write a lot... but I do love to write...it's my way/style of expressing and sharing..keeping things to ourselves sometimes can cause tension and depress and not good..so I like writing...whether people who read it thinks it's boring or what..depends on them.. Im just being myself.
Ta ta see u later my beloved blog! Next will be RHB interview ;)
:)
Well,today I had interview with Maybank...
It was fun, really. Not stressful as mention by people. Just a simple n ordinary interview like those I've attended before. They do have essay test and personality test. But trust me, it was easy. So based on my HR experience, they might pick someone who is confident, talkative n maybe those with sales and marketing experience will be their priority.. :) Well can't blame them if they do. Coz it does minimize cost, in fact, especially in training people to become a good sales/marketing person.
At first they ask how Im doing, good or not, of coz I said Im good, coz I do feel good, I might a bit nervous before enter Maybank Office but once I enter, same as previous interview...the nervous fly away, I became myself again haha. Then they ask regarding my experience, my study background before, my CBG experience.. But most of all 3 of them were so excited asking/talking bout my experience of 6 months in Bintulu. :)
I enjoy the interview, we manage to talk and share a lot. :) And I also being honest with them, how I'm not really into a sales oriented person as I only come to know sales is one of the big scope of the position. Well, as they will found out later based on the personality test, I better just tell them 1st haha, at least Im being honest here. But Im glad...as I observe the 3 of them..their face looks n colour, while I admit and mention Im not really a sales oriented person, I can see their sincere and friendly smile, as if they were saying, "Owh ok, this girl indeed a straightforward and honest!" Haha.. and they also become more open with me,talk and ask me...and share more... :)
From this interview, Im glad they didnt ask things like, "Tell me about urself", "What is ur strength/weakness", those interview questions,for me..is..... unprofessional... -.- sorry I said that,but that's how i feel...coz it is expected and it's a "Google" questions haha... I think most of u would know what I mean..too common.. :)
It makes me happy that, eve after they interview, while waiting for dad to pick me up, they spotted me before they went for lunch and take the times to speak/talking to me again, feel as if they enjoy sharing/talking to me...Good...coz that mean I do have a good rapport with people haha...
I don't know I'll get the job or not... depends on their observation n management approval too... as the Malay said..kalau dah rezeki tak ke mana.. :)
Wow I write a lot... but I do love to write...it's my way/style of expressing and sharing..keeping things to ourselves sometimes can cause tension and depress and not good..so I like writing...whether people who read it thinks it's boring or what..depends on them.. Im just being myself.
Ta ta see u later my beloved blog! Next will be RHB interview ;)
Thursday 12 July 2012
Coming up next: Interview with Maybank and RHB Bank
So much about banking sector... =.=
Well..previously I did mention about me joining banking sector although I don't like it much...but I give it a try..
This Friday, 13 July I'll have an interview/assessment with Maybank...and next week is with RHB Bank..funny rite?...Considering how I really2 dislike banking sector...
But then... always expect the worse... no matter how hard we tried and wanted something, if it didn't meant for us, we still wont get it...same as when we really2 don't want that something, we still have that thing we don't want most... Now that's make me afraid.. -.-
As far as I know, banking sector deal most with sales,marketing,customers, and the SCARIEST of ALL, TARGET. As in TARGET in $$$. That's what I dislike most. There's a reason for that...
Back in 2009, when I first joined the so called professional workforce (as I didn't work as part timers,sales assistant or promoter), I joined a Mercedes dealer company. My post is admin,of course...but my manager and the salesman, they are more to sales and everyday I heard them talking/discuss about sales sales and sales...target target n target....$ $ n $....that makes me phobia.... phobia of what?? Well...sometimes people WILL do ANYTHING to ACHIEVE TARGET...even if it means ILLEGAL short cut.... =.= I guess no need for me to write in details.. But I understand bank do have policy n won't involve anything illegal..but then,and still...Im not really a sales oriented person.... I don't really like to force/persuade people to buy...Y?? Easy...coz I myself didn't like being force into buying something mua haha...for example....each time a sales person (unless it's my frens, they won't do it coz they know me WELL) approached me,be it someone from insurance, agent, promoter, bank staff who promotes credit card...it always annoys me.. -.-
Thats y I didn't like doing sales... simple.
But then...what choice do I have?.. Im not like some people/other people who can really get a good job easily and they have more credit when it happen to be their most fav job...what can I say?.. Im just unlucky...most of the time... I tried hard in everything I do.. but I guess maybe God do plan other things for me when I didnt get the thing I strives hard for...
Ok then..need to do houseworks... continue later on..
Well..previously I did mention about me joining banking sector although I don't like it much...but I give it a try..
This Friday, 13 July I'll have an interview/assessment with Maybank...and next week is with RHB Bank..funny rite?...Considering how I really2 dislike banking sector...
But then... always expect the worse... no matter how hard we tried and wanted something, if it didn't meant for us, we still wont get it...same as when we really2 don't want that something, we still have that thing we don't want most... Now that's make me afraid.. -.-
As far as I know, banking sector deal most with sales,marketing,customers, and the SCARIEST of ALL, TARGET. As in TARGET in $$$. That's what I dislike most. There's a reason for that...
Back in 2009, when I first joined the so called professional workforce (as I didn't work as part timers,sales assistant or promoter), I joined a Mercedes dealer company. My post is admin,of course...but my manager and the salesman, they are more to sales and everyday I heard them talking/discuss about sales sales and sales...target target n target....$ $ n $....that makes me phobia.... phobia of what?? Well...sometimes people WILL do ANYTHING to ACHIEVE TARGET...even if it means ILLEGAL short cut.... =.= I guess no need for me to write in details.. But I understand bank do have policy n won't involve anything illegal..but then,and still...Im not really a sales oriented person.... I don't really like to force/persuade people to buy...Y?? Easy...coz I myself didn't like being force into buying something mua haha...for example....each time a sales person (unless it's my frens, they won't do it coz they know me WELL) approached me,be it someone from insurance, agent, promoter, bank staff who promotes credit card...it always annoys me.. -.-
Thats y I didn't like doing sales... simple.
But then...what choice do I have?.. Im not like some people/other people who can really get a good job easily and they have more credit when it happen to be their most fav job...what can I say?.. Im just unlucky...most of the time... I tried hard in everything I do.. but I guess maybe God do plan other things for me when I didnt get the thing I strives hard for...
Ok then..need to do houseworks... continue later on..
Friday 6 July 2012
July 6, 2012
Today a cold day..raining since morning...just stopped around 10-11 like that..
Lately Im very2 sensitive...n today, Im overly sensitive + emotional.... I just cried... don't know why... probably just tired of everything..n probably was thinking bout him... God will help me stay strong... He'll show the way...
But...wonder until when?...
God... I surrender all to You....
Lately Im very2 sensitive...n today, Im overly sensitive + emotional.... I just cried... don't know why... probably just tired of everything..n probably was thinking bout him... God will help me stay strong... He'll show the way...
But...wonder until when?...
God... I surrender all to You....
Wednesday 27 June 2012
Received Interview Invitation Email from Maybank
Hi there!
Today I received an email from Maybank HQ HR..inviting me for an interview next week, for the post of CRE,Customer Relationship Executive.
It has been so long since I'm nervous when I have interview...haha probably too much and a lots of interviews that I don't know how to feel nervous...but this time, I'm superb NERVOUS hahaha...
Keeps on wondering how the interview would be...what they would ask n etc.... maybe there would even be an assessment held...It's a well known organization we're talking about..Maybank..hahaha...sure they would have a different way of selecting their people ;)
Im glad God answered another of my prayer...which is this email and the interview :) Thank YOU GOD...
Anyway, no matter what, I'll try my best...with God help n I won't stop praying :)
Dear God.. If this is the job for me, pls help me n guide me... If it;s not for me, pls strengthen my heart so that I won't be disappointed too much n won't give up.... Amen.
Today I received an email from Maybank HQ HR..inviting me for an interview next week, for the post of CRE,Customer Relationship Executive.
It has been so long since I'm nervous when I have interview...haha probably too much and a lots of interviews that I don't know how to feel nervous...but this time, I'm superb NERVOUS hahaha...
Keeps on wondering how the interview would be...what they would ask n etc.... maybe there would even be an assessment held...It's a well known organization we're talking about..Maybank..hahaha...sure they would have a different way of selecting their people ;)
Im glad God answered another of my prayer...which is this email and the interview :) Thank YOU GOD...
Anyway, no matter what, I'll try my best...with God help n I won't stop praying :)
Dear God.. If this is the job for me, pls help me n guide me... If it;s not for me, pls strengthen my heart so that I won't be disappointed too much n won't give up.... Amen.
Friday 22 June 2012
Maybank called....
Despite all the messed up of my feelings n life... Maybank HR called me....the gurl said will arrange an interview for me in Sibu next week... they will email me for my confirmation... good news... n also bad news...dunno lah...Im actually not into banking sector..unless this is my destiny..but still...I'll do my best...
And not long after that..my ex colleague in Bintulu called me...he said another project start soon and ask me to join them...but I dun really think Im ready to go back there...after everything that happened to me there...still hurts... I'll leave to God....
And not long after that..my ex colleague in Bintulu called me...he said another project start soon and ask me to join them...but I dun really think Im ready to go back there...after everything that happened to me there...still hurts... I'll leave to God....
Thursday 21 June 2012
Banking Sector?...
Hurm...lately don't know why...everyone is pushing me towards banking sector for my career...n what a coincidence that Maybank have few vacants and I did apply...n today I was informed that Kanowit branch RHB also need people...and I will pass my resume to my brother by the weekend...
On the other hand...I miss him....very much.....there might be nothing between us...I mean any special relationship as we already broke up last May and our 'meeting' last Friday might mean nothing to him and maybe for him to fulfill he's needs.....but it does mean a lot to me....
He might don't love me and treat me like.....what people call it?....baju pakai buang?....nevermind...consider Im just he's.....toy when he's bored....but Im happy enough to see him happy....yup.....I am hurt....badly...when the person I love treated me that way.....but I can't change people....I will just have to keep holding on...until one day...he officially owned by others..by marriage...then..I'll move on...probably...or just watch him from afar....
Despite he's silent attitude after our 'meeting'....he do reply my msg...sometimes....n it makes me happy when I know that he's in good health n condition....I always pray he'll be in good health always....enough for me...
I know Im torturing n hurting myself....but I really can't help it.....can't help the feeling of wanting to be with him...protect him...support him in whatever he do.....
Hmmm...later continue....
On the other hand...I miss him....very much.....there might be nothing between us...I mean any special relationship as we already broke up last May and our 'meeting' last Friday might mean nothing to him and maybe for him to fulfill he's needs.....but it does mean a lot to me....
He might don't love me and treat me like.....what people call it?....baju pakai buang?....nevermind...consider Im just he's.....toy when he's bored....but Im happy enough to see him happy....yup.....I am hurt....badly...when the person I love treated me that way.....but I can't change people....I will just have to keep holding on...until one day...he officially owned by others..by marriage...then..I'll move on...probably...or just watch him from afar....
Despite he's silent attitude after our 'meeting'....he do reply my msg...sometimes....n it makes me happy when I know that he's in good health n condition....I always pray he'll be in good health always....enough for me...
I know Im torturing n hurting myself....but I really can't help it.....can't help the feeling of wanting to be with him...protect him...support him in whatever he do.....
Hmmm...later continue....
Tuesday 15 May 2012
TiRed....Lots Of ThiNkinG....
Hey there...I've just returned from Kuching..had an interview the day before...not sure whether that can be count as an 'interview'..but I'll let it pass..hopefully will get it... =.=
My body still itching due to lots of traveling...going to Bintulu last Saturday and Sunday return to Sibu..then Sunday midnite went to Kuching coz the next morning hv an interview...then on the same day that nite went back Sibu again...damn tired...
I've been on bus the whole nite for the past 2 nite...cant really sleep well...been thinking a lot...expecially about my future career....and him...of course....
I miss him so much...miss him badly...he seems quite busy now probably he's having exam...hope it's really bcoz of that....keep feeling as if he tried to avoid me...although I dont wanna believe that...I ask him if we can hv lunch or dinner together but he said he's busy..alrite then...I pray for him n hope he done well n all da best...
For me..he's my other half...really hope it'll everlasting...although I cant predict n really know what's he's thinking..n feel... Just hope...he can see my care n love for him....
Miss him so much...wondering when both of us can have a chit chat or meeting again...feel like havent talked to each other like years.... Yeah I know...Im overreact.... :)
Miss him damn much...Dear God...Protect him always in whatever he's doing.... n my other prayers too... Amen...
My body still itching due to lots of traveling...going to Bintulu last Saturday and Sunday return to Sibu..then Sunday midnite went to Kuching coz the next morning hv an interview...then on the same day that nite went back Sibu again...damn tired...
I've been on bus the whole nite for the past 2 nite...cant really sleep well...been thinking a lot...expecially about my future career....and him...of course....
I miss him so much...miss him badly...he seems quite busy now probably he's having exam...hope it's really bcoz of that....keep feeling as if he tried to avoid me...although I dont wanna believe that...I ask him if we can hv lunch or dinner together but he said he's busy..alrite then...I pray for him n hope he done well n all da best...
For me..he's my other half...really hope it'll everlasting...although I cant predict n really know what's he's thinking..n feel... Just hope...he can see my care n love for him....
Miss him so much...wondering when both of us can have a chit chat or meeting again...feel like havent talked to each other like years.... Yeah I know...Im overreact.... :)
Miss him damn much...Dear God...Protect him always in whatever he's doing.... n my other prayers too... Amen...
Wednesday 9 May 2012
DePreSSeD!!
Depressed....stress..tension...dissapointed...sad...hurt....aLL in ONE!! :'(
I guess what others always said were true after all... they will change right after they got what they've been wanted all along...no more sweet talks..no more caring attitude...no more lots of chatting/talks..instead it'll seem like they'll keep away n sort of...avoiding.... can't sense the sincerity...while b4 they get what they've been wanted...they're always there by our side...
But its ok...coz..I love him..I'll wait..for him to change back..or at least...until he knows how much I love him n care for him...or even worse....until he left me... :(
Dear God..If U hear my pray...Pls open his heart..n let him see how much I care for him n love him... Amen...
I guess what others always said were true after all... they will change right after they got what they've been wanted all along...no more sweet talks..no more caring attitude...no more lots of chatting/talks..instead it'll seem like they'll keep away n sort of...avoiding.... can't sense the sincerity...while b4 they get what they've been wanted...they're always there by our side...
But its ok...coz..I love him..I'll wait..for him to change back..or at least...until he knows how much I love him n care for him...or even worse....until he left me... :(
Dear God..If U hear my pray...Pls open his heart..n let him see how much I care for him n love him... Amen...
Wednesday 2 May 2012
Sad...
Right now... I feel this....
God... give me strength... I'm so so so sad.... :(
I only show my concern..is it wrong?...
I can sense n see you're trying to avoid me..though I don't know and not sure whether you really are...
I have feelings too...Am not just any toys...
I know you're busy... I just wanna cheer you up and became your strength...
But no matter how busy you are...I just hope that you wouldn't say such words such sentence...
But you said it already... and it hurts like hell...regardless you said it purposely or not....
Are u sincere?... Or just playing around?...But deep in my heart I can feel that you also have the feelings that I had...
Just..maybe coz you're a guy then you're a bit ego...
What you said just now...really influence me a lot... :(
Just hoping... I can forget what you had said... :(
But I can't....hurts....so much...
God... give me strength... I'm so so so sad.... :(
I only show my concern..is it wrong?...
I can sense n see you're trying to avoid me..though I don't know and not sure whether you really are...
I have feelings too...Am not just any toys...
I know you're busy... I just wanna cheer you up and became your strength...
But no matter how busy you are...I just hope that you wouldn't say such words such sentence...
But you said it already... and it hurts like hell...regardless you said it purposely or not....
Are u sincere?... Or just playing around?...But deep in my heart I can feel that you also have the feelings that I had...
Just..maybe coz you're a guy then you're a bit ego...
What you said just now...really influence me a lot... :(
Just hoping... I can forget what you had said... :(
But I can't....hurts....so much...
BeeN tHinKing A LoT...
I keep on thinking...n thinking....n thinking.....bout him..bout me...bout us....what will happen next... I'm really unto him.. :) Does he feel this way too?..Although I'm a bit doubt it...men mah...ego.... =.=
I was so tense, so stresses...n sad....but got some good sentences and advise from my friend....at least manage to calm me a bit =.=
Well... among the things my friend said....
"Marriage is about love, sharing, liking and being happy together...
DON'T FIND SOMEONE THAT U CAN LIVE WITH... BUT FIND SOMEONE THAT U CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT"
Be happy with someone that can make u happy even though belum tentu u akan kawin dgn nya
So, go on with your life, follow the flow... "
So I guess I'll follow the advise...am trying my best...to just go on with my life..n follow the flow... :)
I was so tense, so stresses...n sad....but got some good sentences and advise from my friend....at least manage to calm me a bit =.=
Well... among the things my friend said....
"Marriage is about love, sharing, liking and being happy together...
DON'T FIND SOMEONE THAT U CAN LIVE WITH... BUT FIND SOMEONE THAT U CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT"
Be happy with someone that can make u happy even though belum tentu u akan kawin dgn nya
So, go on with your life, follow the flow... "
So I guess I'll follow the advise...am trying my best...to just go on with my life..n follow the flow... :)
Tuesday 1 May 2012
It's MaY!!!
OMG!! It's been 2 months since I last update my blog...
The past 2 months...a lot happened.... My grandma (late grandpa's sister) past away.. 3 weeks later my aunt past away..
But most of all... 28 & 30 April... had became my most wonderful, unforgettable day!!
Especially on the 28.. my first...!!!! :) ;)
And guess what?? Now I'm in a relationship
(Although we havent announce and make it official as he said he don't want to rush...but it feels weird when he said that as it seems like we've already 'rush' in 'it'..but nevermind -.- )
N I love him very much & hope will end with marriage.. For me, now he's my other half :)
I'm not sure how he feels though... I mean whether he really committed with our relationship or just playing around.. But I do hope he's not... Coz I know he's busy with work & study, but he still manage to spare his time for me when I needed him :) I really really hope our relationship will last..forever.. :) Talking bout him make me miss him already ;)
If only I can read his mind n his heart..but..well....men are good at hiding their feelings & emotion...we'll never know... It might still be too early...as he said...but...I really hope...he's also like me..wanna keep it forever... :)
Dear.. I miss u n love u so muchhh!! :)
The past 2 months...a lot happened.... My grandma (late grandpa's sister) past away.. 3 weeks later my aunt past away..
But most of all... 28 & 30 April... had became my most wonderful, unforgettable day!!
Especially on the 28.. my first...!!!! :) ;)
And guess what?? Now I'm in a relationship
(Although we havent announce and make it official as he said he don't want to rush...but it feels weird when he said that as it seems like we've already 'rush' in 'it'..but nevermind -.- )
N I love him very much & hope will end with marriage.. For me, now he's my other half :)
I'm not sure how he feels though... I mean whether he really committed with our relationship or just playing around.. But I do hope he's not... Coz I know he's busy with work & study, but he still manage to spare his time for me when I needed him :) I really really hope our relationship will last..forever.. :) Talking bout him make me miss him already ;)
If only I can read his mind n his heart..but..well....men are good at hiding their feelings & emotion...we'll never know... It might still be too early...as he said...but...I really hope...he's also like me..wanna keep it forever... :)
Dear.. I miss u n love u so muchhh!! :)
Friday 2 March 2012
Thursday 1 March 2012
My Past 6 Months' Life....
Where should I start?....
*************************************************************************************
September, 2011
Everything begins in September...While I’m still a CBGian....
Early September….don‘t know why….that song keep on running through my mind my head….which song?..well of course the one that I had posted earlier in my blog…When September End…maybe it was meant to remind me of my past..or probably just some signed God give which I haven’t thought of.
1st week of September. I feel very de-motivated. My manager seems like he never appreciates what I do, what I accomplished. How glad I am that my supervisor (the executive) knows how to appreciate me and she gave me lots of advice, motivation & encouragement. And also…the motivator (a speaker / CEO of a local college which I had known while conducting a training for the staffs’). Those two, and with few of other CBGians and colleagues’ that know how to appreciate us CBGians, are those who manage to give me the will….to keep holding on.
The motivator always email me..asking how I was doing…have I found a job, and said that sooner or later I’ll find a job for myself coz he said that I’m very hardworking. Why he said that?? Well…I cooperate with him for quite a long time in order for me to conduct the staff training successfully…probably he observed from that time onward…yeah…probably…Among all things…I’ll never forget the sentence which he said to me..he said:
"TAKE THE CBG AS PLATFORM TO TAKE OFF. FLY HIGHER WITH THE EXPERIENCE. CBG SOON BECOMES HISTORY BUT BE PATIENCE, TAKE OFF WHEN U R EQUIPPED"
Keep holding on…until mid of September….I made a decision…I’ll leave by the end of the month, resign as a CBG, I’ll find whatever jobs that’s available after I resign, even if it’s a part timer job. My closest cousin, knowing my situation also keeps on help me to find job…
Third week of September..I received a phone call..asking me to come to another town for interview the next day..very last minute..but I was grateful because my executive support me and let me took leave to attend the interview…I still remember the interview that…September 22, 2011.
The interview went smoothly..despite the fact that the interview was done in their staff house coz didn’t have an office yet n I got lost while getting to the interview place…the interviewer said that she’ll inform me again regarding the status…late that afternoon..I received her sms saying that their HR Manager from Singapore want to meet me and asked me to join their staff dinner that night…..I repeat….their STAFF DINNER……..So I joined the dinner that night although feel uncomfortable coz I’m not their staff…..yet….. but the dinner went smoothly..we even took pictures…
On the same day…after the dinner..on midnight…before I went to sleep, I received sms from the interviewer, asking me to report duty on the coming Monday, September 26, 2011…I was…shocked n blur.....by that time, I know that they desperately need people but I still didn’t know the reason…I inform her the earliest I can start duty is on Tuesday, September 27 as I also need to settle my things and resign from CBG…she agreed but asked me to come to the same house where we had the interview the next day….
September 23, 2011 (Friday)
I wake up early waiting for the interviewer to pick me up…afterward we went to the staff’s house as their temporary office is there….
Once we reached there…I met the HR Manager & the HR Exec again…both of them said they are grateful that I’m willing to come on that day as they want to brief me some procedure/tasks before I report duty on September 27, 2011. So I spend my whole day there discuss lots of issues especially those related to Sarawak Labor Ordinance as they are not local company and need some of my view….How glad I am that I’ve done my revision as the last time I done my revision was during my university moment, which is in 2009?...Haha….
September 27, 2011
So I report duty today…I start my day with payroll and time sheet…as their cut off date is on 25th every month and this is the first time the payroll are done here as for 1st and 2nd time were done by HQ in Singapore…so based on the excel sample they give me last Friday, I create another one…and key in all the employees data….one by one….into the excel sheet...I go through their P File one by one to avoid mistakes and lots of it I still need to double confirm with HQ and liaise with them….after 2 and half day, I manage to come out with a proper excel datasheet of everyone which I try my best to format and create from the sample provided…I started to key in the figures necessary and…..so on…….my life change since then…
October 1, 2011
Today, me and my manager (Admin Manager) move to site office….very small office….but couldn’t be worse than no office at all, right?..Yeap…so I should be thankful….I still remember…first week of October….both me and my manager haven’t even once…use the office washroom….we prefer went to our client, main contractor washroom haha….however…after both of us cleaned the washroom and office (housekeeping)…then we started to use our own office washroom….
The rest…..lead a very busy life day and night…..almost everything need to be done manually…
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Within 2 months…I’ve managed to create a more efficient payroll excel database….I even create payslip system using the same payroll excel file, except that different sheet, of course…I remember I’ve manage to create the payslip system in one month time…not automatically…still semi auto haha….why I said so?..coz still need to enter staff number, only then every particulars and details will appear and can print..but still…better then key in one by one with staffs’ number increasing and really a waste of time if I were to key in their basic, allowance, OT, SOCSO, EPF and everything one by one haha….one of my achievement which I wouldn’t forget….and I started to learn using mail merger and etc…
Very busy life…can considered as no life…why?..Because, every morning wake up at 4 am, took off to site around 5.15 am or 5.30 am especially after I moved to company’s hostel…and only reach town or hostel around 8 pm or above if got anything urgent…even after office hour (office hour at site is 7.30 am – 6.30 pm), I still need to continue my paperwork at ‘home’ coz too many things to cover…since both me and my manager don’t have assistant to help us..the management did propose to hire some more people to help both of us..but recruit the right people on the right time, right place, right job…not as easy…especially when we consider the workplace situation/environment…for sure we’ll feel sorry for the new member if she or he were to joined us…however…my manager managed to get office assistant to help us a bit…
After 3 months…around mid of November…become demoralized…..actually…when come to my 2nd month…lots of things happened….regardless either happy, unhappy, good or bad things…well….anywhere we worker…organization politics are unavoidable….same thing happen to me…no need to explain details for other incoming matters…..people up there started to blab bla bla n even accused us of nothing….never even appreciate our efforts…my efforts….days and night….
Keep holding on.......
When come to December….worsen…”that activity” become more active….even involve the the PDRM side….but still…up until January…that person who came and stays there since December…still want to back up the one who shouldn’t be backed up…Mid January….I came to realize…I’ve given them(the people here/some of people outside here but still within same organization) enough chance….still no changes…keep on taking in does who shouldn’t be taken in….even up to this time..I can even see that our subcon are being treated better and special than us who was employed directly under this organization…by end of January…I decide I’ll leave…since nobody is listening….what’s the point to stay….I don’t want when the local authorities found it out, my career is doomed….I’m willing to be jobless for a while rather than getting my name blacklist by ‘JTK’…..those people (2-4 of them) keep on insisting to take those outsiders in through improper way improper procedure although I’ve reminded the project under SCORE must prioritize locals but yet they won’t listen…worse…even said that locals don’t know how to work…..WTH??? Maybe in some area those outsiders are more expert, but shouldn’t said all those things..it hurt us..hurt me…me who have been sacrificed my time….days working…night time continues on until morning sometime…there are times when I didn’t get sleep for one whole week…even during my rest day, I even work/done my paperwork, even I went back to my hometown, during X’mas time…I even do my payroll…regardless of what my family complained coz I don’t have time for them…..that’s not the only issue….since January….I can’t get everyone cooperation…only a few in the team willing to cooperate….and I started to became their ‘Sandwich’ since December…why??....Coz I’m always the one who ended up stuck in the middle coz they don’t want to cooperate…blaming each other…everyone started to became selfish….and I’m the one who became VICTIM!!...
Keep holding on.......
Tired of became sandwich, tired of their attitude, their behavior, tired of some of the illegal things which I don’t like at all but have to for the sake of my job, tired of all those selfishness…..I decided to quit…sooner or later…
Keep holding on.......
For the illegal things…no need to mention…they just prefer to take short cut than actual procedure….have inform them it was risky…nobody listen….even my superior..this time she even just proceed…although previously she really against it….this time around….is my climax..can’t stand any longer…especially after keep on becoming sandwich for those peoples’ sake and after one incident/case where people don’t believe me/doubt me…..so I quit…February 14, 2012. I quit my job. So currently waiting for another job offer..hope won’t get into a corrupted environment again….Amen
The End....and It's March 1, 2012...
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